Being a Parent: Questions and Answers

parenting-title-image_tcm7-188622Let me start off with I am not a parent; however I have great respect for those that take on the endeavor–it is an experience unlike any other. Often times requiring a balance of unconditional and conditional love, it is an intense task to be a parent and it can hold both great rewards and challenges.

The depth of my respect continues to grow as I watch and am close to those carrying their first child, bringing up a toddler, going through rough times with teens or young adults and often being 100% responsible for their grown up kids, men and women in their 50’s and 60’s depending solely on a parent or parents to survive.  In my mind, parenting doesn’t stop when a child reaches the age of 18. All people mature differently; I have met a 30 year old that seemed like a 17 year old and vice versa. Every day, every moment, every second a new baby is being born somewhere and parents must realize they are the ones shaping these babies and teaching them how to inhabit the earth. Every living thing creates synergy, energy, motion at any given moment, and influences the world we all live in. We, adults and children, are all responsible, accountable for what happens on this earth.

I heard a scene from a screen play last night, The Violent Men (1955), a Western. A character says, “Men will always find reasons to avoid peace.”  I found this statement profound and wonder how much more relevant this statement is in these times of strife, anarchy, disrespect, violence, and random senseless brutality. Of course we have those standing up for love, union, equality and homemade cookies, too. What kind of a parent are you?


Whether or not you have children, we all seek answers to the question: why is this happening?  Today Hilary Clinton released WHAT HAPPENED. Looks fascinating. She addresses many things including her debate with Trump; how he acted in a menacing way during the debates and how she allowed it. She asks her own questions and gives the answers to some of ours.


As I ran through the script of my show THE PASS yesterday, I heard a recurring theme and it is… What just happened? I ask you, if you are reading this blog, what is happening, in your own words…please share.


chants-field-mirror-4-by-alex-baker-photographyFor several decades now, since the highly individualistic 60’s, people seem to have gravitated more to group dynamics than to self-expression. Until recently that is. With the election of Trump, and with corporate politics being constantly questioned, people are again realizing the value of forming their own opinions, instead of having their ideas dictated to them via peer pressure.

Too often we put ourselves into boxes and then stick labels on them, so we are stuck with whatever judgment or perceptions these labels have generated.  In time we may need to get out! Staying fluid, we may come off as wishy-washy. Is there a way to keep your opinions fluid and on a personal level? Leaving the generalizations and stereo types aside and hence allowing more diversity in our lives.

My show, THE PASS, is very much an individual journey. I have always seen the value of following my own path – listening to my own voice even when there were others doing everything they could to convince me otherwise – was often a challenge especially when I first got started. I titled my first CD SELF and the front panel (a sticker made from Mylar on which we printed only the word SELF and inserted into the package; we went to great lengths to find these!) acts as a mirror when people pick it up.  Self-awareness when you pick up my music was the intention.

SELF Denise Marsa

Be an individual, stand out from the crowd and listen to your own voice. That way you’ll always be sure to be heard.